So here’s the thing: If you’re sleeping in the bar it’s time to go home. Don’t tell me “he’s fine, just leave him alone” What a great friend you are that it’s more important that you keep partying than it is to get your friend into a safe environment. I’ll tell you what, how about you take him out of the bar, or Denver PD will, that way it’ll only cost him about five hundred dollars to spend the night in detox. You dick. Ohhhh I’m the asshole because I wont let your friend sleep in the bar? The only thing that will make this situation better is if you argue with me for ten minutes about your friend leaving, then finally decide to carry him out of here while he vomits all over the middle of the dining room, sweet that’s exactly what just happened. I’ll just grab a mop. I should have gone to college.
Monthly Archives: July 2015
What are friends for…
So here’s the thing: I’m picking up a friend the other day and I’m waiting outside his place for him to come down. As I sit there pondering life, because he’s never on time, I started feeling a little positive about my physical appearance. As you know I’ve gained a significant amount of weight over the past couple of years and have been reduced to showering with a t-shirt on these days, but this day I felt like I was looking better. I started to smile as I sit alone in my car. I looked up to see Greg walking towards my car. He gets in and the first words out of his mouth were “So, you don’t even suck it in anymore?” I looked down at my stomach and it looked like my seat belt was trying to kill a pregnant woman’s baby. We started laughing, then we left. Ahhhhhhh friends! Hey, I’m not bald.